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Monday, July 31, 2017

#itsoktotalk - Using Social Media to Battle Depression on Instagram



There is often stigma when it comes to talking about mental health. I have seen many people keep their mental health problems a secret because of the stigma behind it. Instagram wants to change that on its social media site.
Check out this article from Men’s Health to see how.
Here are just some hashtags you can use:
#ItsOkayToTalk
#HereForYou

Friday, July 28, 2017

Continuing Education Continues at Rutgers School of Social Work



After completing the first course, I went beyond the basics of Schema Therapy. On Friday, July 11th, I once again went to Rutgers School of Social Work to continue my education on this therapy. The course went more in depth on this technique which will help clients who are in need of help with their lifelong self-defeating patterns of functioning.

Thursday, July 27, 2017

Is technology helping you or hurting you? Is it stressing you out?



As a counselor, I work with many people who are dealing with a lot of stress. More and more, technology is becoming a reason for increased stress in people's everyday lives. Stress from technology is also worldwide. Read this article from Strategic Psychology (a counseling service in Australia) about the stress of modern day technology and some tips to lesson your stress levels.

https://www.beckercounseling.com/is-technology-causing-you-more-stress/

Friday, July 21, 2017

Males and Their Emotions - How Does Society Influence Them?




There are many stereotypes for men and their emotions. As a male counselor, I see some clients hold onto these stereotypes and live by them. There are so many historical viewpoints to consider in dealing with human emotions. Take a look at this New York Times articlehttps://www.nytimes.com/2016/04/10/education/edlife/teaching-men-to-be-emotionally-honest.html?_r=0 about men and their emotions - and "how boys are taught, sometimes with the best of intentions, to mutate their emotional suffering into anger."

What do you think?

https://www.beckercounseling.com/males-and-emotions-how-much-does-society-influence-it/

Tuesday, July 18, 2017

Should I stay or should I go?




Are you going to stay together or split?  Sometimes its the most difficult decision ever. Contact Becker Counseling if you are trying to decide, and need someone to listen.

https://www.beckercounseling.com/should-you-stay-together-or-divorce/

Monday, July 17, 2017

Schema Therapy Basics - new techniques for couseling



On Friday, July 14th, I attended an educational course at Rutgers School of Social Work to learn more about schema therapy basics. This course covered an innovative psychotherapy approach which integrates cognitive therapy, behavior therapy, object relations and gestalt therapy. This approach was created to work with clients who have chronic depression, personality disorders and other individual and couples problems.

I am dedicated to ongoing education to make sure I can provide the best care for my clients.

Wednesday, July 12, 2017

Do you think alcohol is a problem in your marriage or family?




You and Drinking
Do you think alcohol is a problem in your marriage or family? Has it caused legal, health or money problems? Are you living with an alcoholic or are you the one with the problem?
You are definitely not alone. Recently actor Ben Affleck announced publicly he had completed rebab treatment for his long time drinking problem. Also, celebrities Bradley Cooper, Lindsay Lohan, Mel Gibson, Anthony Hopkins, Elton John, Steven Tyler, Eminem and Stephen King have publicly shared their battle with alcohol. Some have relapsed but all are honest about the damage done to their lives, families and careers.
Drinking is a common factor in many clients I see for counseling. Interestingly, most people come in to see me complaining mainly of other problems. Drinking is not usually mentioned until I ask about it. Then it is disclosed, but often minimized or dismissed. I believe many people are in denial of the effects of drinking on their personal lives. But it must be addressed and made a priority.
Communication issues are frequently mentioned along with alcohol. Texting inappropriate messages while drunk is a common occurrence and unfortunately these texts can’t be “unsent”; someone ends up being hurt. Someone may be arrested or get a DUI. Drinking too much may cause friends to become alienated. Family members are afraid to bring it up. Couples find it very hard to talk about, so they deal with it in silence.
Other negative impacts on relationships include becoming socially withdrawn, abnormal behavior, anger and violent outbursts, sexual problems or health issues. Drinking can be an expensive and time wasting habit. Sex lives suffer in many cases. Health can become a major problem over time and alcoholism often times progressively becomes a debilitating and devastating disease.
The hardest part for the drinker or the one living with the drinker is a feeling of helplessness. Maybe you can’t control your own or someone else’s drinking, which in turn exacerbates the feelings of loneliness and isolation. The first step is getting help and not feeling ashamed or embarrassed to ask for help.
No one can get better until they personally decide to do it themselves; you can’t force someone to get help, but you can start by communicating with them and expressing your concerns. Sometimes when a drinker hits “rock bottom”, they have an epiphany and realize that they are hurting themselves and everyone around them. It is important that everyone involved has hope and knows there is always a way to recovery.
If you or someone close to you needs help, please call us today and let us help find a way to get healthy, sober and live a fuller life. Contact us or call us today at 732.406.4422

Monday, July 10, 2017

When Anger Wins, Love Loses




I found this article on MarriageBuilders.com and thought about anger, and how destructive it can be.


Check out this artilce on some interesting thoughts about how anger can affect your marriage.

"Remember, in marriage you can be your spouse's greatest source of pleasure, but you can also be your spouse's greatest source of pain, particularly if you use the controlling and abusive strategies of demands, disrespect and anger to try to get what you need in marriage. If you use them, you are almost sure to lose your spouse's love for you."

https://www.beckercounseling.com/becker-counseling-when-anger-wins-love-loses-angry-couple/

Friday, July 7, 2017

Question for the day - Can a porn addiction cost you your marriage?



"My Husband's Porn Addiction Destroyed Our Marriage.
When I found out about his secret life, at first I blamed myself."

This story originally appeared in the July 2002 issue of Good Housekeeping. Names have been changed. But technology and porn are on the rise. 

Read on to see how this husband's porn addiction cost him his marriage.

Wednesday, July 5, 2017

There are serious mental costs of watching porn.



Do you or someone you care about have a serious porn addiction?

This article on "Fight the New Drug" was guest written by Dan Gray (LCSW, CSAT), the Clinical Director and co-founder at Lifestar Therapy. He has a master’s degree in social work and is a CSAT (Certified Sexual Addiction Therapist). He is also certified as an addictions counselor with the National Association of Forensic Counselors.

"Why You Feel Anxious And Depressed After Watching Porn" highlights how "pornography is addictive, which in the long run rewires the brain, kills relationships, and can lead to abusive relationships against women and men."

Has technology just made this addiction too easy?

Monday, July 3, 2017

Red State, Blue State: 10 Tips for Feuding Families


With this being a holiday weekend, maybe you are around your family more often? But, is your family feuding? Here are 10 tips from www.Health.com:
  1. Avoiding family fights
  2. It’s normal to disagree
  3. Don’t drink too much
  4. Recognize your triggers
  5. Take a time-out
  6. Control your reaction
  7. Avoid labels
  8. Agree to disagree
  9. Be open
  10. Just don’t go there
And in the end – Remember why you are there!